For stroke survivors, I know as I am one myself, there are many limiting beliefs that hold us back.
Personally, for myself and for many of my clients, I know for a fact that believing that we can’t do something is one of, if not the biggest, limiting beliefs.
A stroke survivor has every right to believe this. They only just survived, have had to relearn how to do most things again and now they are expected to do more!? Surely you can’t expect them to go on an adventure!
There are already many limiting beliefs for stroke survivors that rightly they should have or have every reason to have. However, in saying this, there comes a time where limiting beliefs don’t do anything but hold ourselves back and stop the progress.
Stop the “adventure” we once had in our lives as well as the zest we once had towards life that we have almost fully lost… In saying this, don’t you think it is worth the risk (obviously within reason) to push the boundaries (and push past the limiting beliefs put on us from others as well as ourselves)? Push past these limiting beliefs towards pure joy?
Yes, us stroke survivors now have a deeply in bult limiting belief system of “I can’t do this” or “I shouldn’t do that” etc… I am not arguing against anything you literally cannot do or you are medically recommended not to do… All I am saying is after having had a stroke myself, I have found (and quite enjoyed) that pushing the boundaries brings with it progress. It is very easy to settle into the “I can’t do this, or that” world where you then get “stuck” so to say in your comfort zone of no progression. If you get stuck in this comfort zone of no progression, you can get stuck in a “I’m not happy” or a “I’m depressed, and I don’t want to live zone”.
There is a man…
If you have not heard of this man, I recommend that you Google and YouTube him as he has the power to change your life, as he has changed mine indeed. Nick Vuyjicic was born limbless. Nick was born without arms and without legs. Nick was bullied and had a very difficult up bringing, but he had a mother who deeply loved him. He found himself in a bath and he held his breath and went under water.
As he was underwater, he planned on ending his life. His mother came into his mind, and he decided then and there that he couldn’t leave this earth because of how he saw his mother react to his death in his mind. Nick went on to approach church after church to preach the gospel of God. He was turned down, but he kept trying. He kept on getting turned down, until one day a church accepted his request of wanting to preach the gospel of God at their church. After preaching for a while at this church and then other churches, a woman was watching him preach. This woman is now his wife, and now they have children together. Nick is now a world-famous speaker who has spoken in over 15 countries around the world and has spoken over one thousand times at different events.
When I went to listen to Tony Robbins and Nick Vujicic speak, Nick was incredible. He was unforgettable… He spoke with such conviction and connected with each and every one in the audience. You could hear a pit drop whilst he spoke. He got us all holding our phones and got us to all call our mothers to let them know how much we loved her. My dad answered the phone though when I called. Haha, oh well, I went on to tell him that I loved him none the less.
I mentioned Nick here for a reason. Nick would have been in his “comfort zone” when he was bullied, and didn’t want to leave his house, didn’t want to do much at all, and overall struggled with life. Because of whatever reason it was that was able to push himself forward (I believe it was his mother and, for him God) he went from wanting to kill himself to being able to surf, sky dive as well as later to be able to talk on stage in front of thousands of people worldwide.
When you are feeling unwanted, alone, not worthwhile, or not even wanting to be here being a burden on others remember this:
Living life in your comfort zone/world of limiting beliefs will not help you one little bit!
I have not been camping for many years (not since I flew to Canada to visit my brother).
My trip to Canada was approximately 6-8 years ago now. I remember the camping adventure we went on was so much fun and I it all went smoothly. Yet why haven’t I been camping since? It comes down to the same thing that I have been talking about (as well as life just continuing on of course). Why do we have more difficulty getting out of our comfort zone and have a more powerful limiting belief system than others?
All of us like to be comfortable. We like to not be pushed out of our nice little sphere of comfort and joy. We. Like to remain nice and cosy in our comfort zone, and we don’t like making many changes. I do love pushing myself, yet it always comes with some resistance as I’m sure it comes with you too! There is this saying that I love that goes like this: “get comfortable with the uncomfortable until it becomes comfortable”. You get the idea, right? If you do enough things that push your boundaries of comfort, your comfort zone will continue to expand.
As April approached in 2023, I began to get excited, because a night of camping was fast approaching. My fiancé and a group of her friends planned to go camping in this beautiful camping ground beside a river in Orange NSW Australia. As we drove to her friend’s place from our home the excitement continued. The temperature continued to drop as we continued to drive. After the long drive there I became fatigued, even a bit grumpy too. It was a 3.5-hour drive from our home. The beautiful scenery kept it interesting though.
After we arrived at my fiancés friend’s home, we realised that we all needed to go shopping to get a few last-minute supplies. By this stage I was exhausted! I decided to stay in the car and get a few minutes of quiet time to myself. Whilst I was sitting there in the car, I thought this is the perfect opportunity to write a blog about this adventure that we have all embarked on.
This is a good opportunity for me to write a blog on my adventure and on how I managed it being a stroke survivor.
This was my opportunity to show you how I made it possible to take part in this camping adventure, and how you can do the same too. This is how this blog idea took place, from an Aldi car park in Rural NSW (out in the country).
It started lightly raining and we all kept on hoping that the rain would settle down and stop. All of these thoughts were racing through my mind about us all getting cold and wet. Why are we all pushing ourselves out of our comfort zone to go camping whilst it is so cold and whilst it is now drizzling?! God help us. On the other side of our comfort zone is an even more comfortable, enjoyable and exciting zone. This area is where memories are created. You don’t easily create memories being comfortable in your home, right?
We all set out to go camping to have a good time with close friends of course. For me being a stroke survivor, yes, I did have a bit of resistance towards this camping trip we embarked on. Yet once I found out none of her friends had ever gone caping, this made me feel more comfortable. I told everyone that we will have to get to the campground early so that we can reserve a good spot. It began raining so they thought that we didn’t need to go too early to reserve a spot, but it was the Easter long weekend, so I knew that they were wrong, but I went along with it. How could I argue with 6 other people?! Haha, I guess I had to let them experience their first camping trip properly. Maybe next time they will learn… So, in summary if you’ve had a stroke and wish to go camping get to the campground early!
From past experiences, and like everyone experiences, when you push yourself out of your comfort zone amazing things can happen.
I believed the camping expedition was going to be extraordinary, however I had to pace myself to keep a nice level of energy. Pacing yourself can put yourself out of your comfort zone as well… You’ll have to get used to being ok with your own thoughts about what other people may or may not think about you. For example, you probably will need a good rest once you get to the campground (or wherever your adventure takes you. You also may think what other people (friends of friends for example) will think of you if you need a good rest once the tent is set up. In all honesty it took me years to be ok with the negative thoughts so to say that come along with being a stroke survivor.
These negative thoughts do come up from time to time and it is a constant battle dealing with these thoughts. I started off by starting my own Instagram page sharing insight into life from a stroke survivors’ perspective. I had no idea how this would go, but my page started growing much faster than I expected. It looked like many stroke survivors were searching for answers. My Instagram page is @stroke_recovery_guidelines and you can find some helpful posts on there with some good Instagram Live interviews as well.
I also wrote a book, The Simplicity of Life-Stroke Recovery Guidelines, which you can get here.
Our negative mind post-stroke is a powerful and mostly unhelpful part of ourselves (I know from experience).
On my Instagram page, in my book and in my Toolkit, you’ll find plenty of coping mechanisms in the form of exercises, tips & tricks. Have a look as they may be able to help you! I have learnt such good coping mechanisms, exercises, tips and tricks on my 17 years stroke recovery journey.
Having studied counselling and mentoring for around 4-5 years I have also learnt some useful tasks that integrate very well into managing your emotions post stroke. I have integrated all my learnings from my study as well as what I have learnt from my experiences throughout my life into a unique counselling & mentoring experience.
The two digital products I mentioned earlier are designed to help stroke survivors on their journey and unlike any other tools out there. If you decide to get the product/s, you can also gain access to my private Facebook Group for stroke survivors as well.
My message in this blog about adventure is that, yes, the mind is a powerful part of us and it can be incredibly helpful. However, our mind can also hold us back so much without us even realising. We need to develop a good level of awareness of ourselves being stroke survivors. We need to know when to back off, when to keep pushing and in this case when to ignore and push forwards (within reason as well as sometimes slightly without).
Our mind controls us, but sometimes we need to ignore the mind, and control it. We should risk pushing through the limiting beliefs sometimes (with the right support around us) to be able to enjoy the richness and fullness of life.
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